Monday, November 20, 2006

Cold Pillows

Update, Oct 13, 2007-Since many people continue to come to my website searching for 'refrigerated pillows, I would like to turn you on to the chillow, which is exactly what it sounds like.


This one is for all you like-minded people who love turning your pillow over throughout the night so you can experience one of the greatest blisses that can be found in life-a cold pillow.

My desire for the perfect cold pillow has led me to the usual extremes that one might pass to attain nocturnal nirvana. For one, avoiding putting your arms underneath your pillow will keep the underside of the pillow from accumulating heat. Then, when you are ready, flip over the pillow and you have instant coolness!

Secondly, multiple pillows are helpful, allowing you to switch to a cooler pillow. Whichever pillow you are not using will not accumulate heat and thus will be ready for you at your leisure.

Depending how far down the road you are willing to go to the feed your desire for coolness in bed, there are yet other options available to you should you care to use them.

The obvious next step would be the accurate setting of your thermostat. I cannot sleep unless my thermostat is set at least 70 degrees. This is an all-seasonal preference, not excluding winter months.

This choice has been to the detriment of significant relationships in my life. Women do NOT like to be cold. It is my opinion that when women realized they were able to assert this fact in the bedroom this provided the spark(no pun intended)that began the women's liberation movement. If you will remember, the burning of bras was a significant women's demonstration in the 1960s-it all began with this long-desired need for heat, and until this point, it went largely unmet.

Because of this fact, I have decided that when I grow up I'm going to marry a polar bear.

Last night I discovered a new way to attain new cold blissness.
This particular technique was developed on my bed of choice, a queen, but any wide-size bed will allow you to accomplish this following effect.

When you first get into your bed and you have been running your thermostat at a cold temperature you may find your bed is already pleasantly cold.

As you inhabit the bed you will find that your body temperature will quickly warm up the coldness that you initially gloried yourself in.

In order to counteract this, favor a particular side of the bed, taking care to remove blankets and sheets from the unoccupied part of the bed. Then when you are ready, shift to the previously vacant part of the bed where you will return to temporary but effective frigid bliss. Do not forget to again remove blankets and covers from the unoccupied part of the bed so that you can repeat as often as necessary.

This will not work if you are sleeping with a companion.

Especially a polar bear.